ABOUT CONTINUED

melissa has taino, yoruba & celtic ancestry (haitian / irish)- and the example of her ancestors is a guiding light and a source of pride for her. ireland's rich history of resilience inspires her. in relating to the petro spirits of the haitian revolution she feels closest to her taino ancestors / of turtle island.

the other key defining feature of her identity is her rare and difficult diagnosis of bipolar disorder 1 with psychotic features. this has resulted in a twenties marked by instability, mental hospital visits, and an incredible amount of suffering. for years she considered her suffering a waste and felt bitter resentment for what she believed was lost and the pain she endured. at times feeling a sharp jealousy of those she percieved to have a "normal life"- believing at her core that her life was over

originally looking to practice haitian vodou she ended up falling into santeria instead- and similarly in heavily researching haitian history she learned that her personal hero- vodou priest & revolution leader francis makandal's last words were The Shahada. through her research she learn about haiti's relatively unknown Islamic past and found that many of her ancestors- like francis makandal- practiced both islam + vodou. following in their footsteps: both santeria and islam have become central to her life

only within the last few months has she had a different perspective. she now sees her suffering as molding her into something unique and giving her new insight. her depressions or psychosis that forced her to drop out of school multiple times- ultimately  allowed her to learn about new subjects that she never would've considered if she was healthy: such as architecture and experimental theater

melissa is not always grateful to have suffered / suffer but is increasingly becoming appreciative for who she is now because of her suffering